Welcome to Common Room 2

I'm not to hot for blogging at the moment, not sure why, I just am enjoying thinking about the life and times of me in my head instead of rambling away on here.

One very important thing to note is how amazing Spiderman 3 was!  I'm going to go all out and say it's my favourite of them all!  The 4-person fight at the end was so IMMENSE.  I'm so glad Venom was as insane as I was hoping for  unhinged villains are the best!  Ooh, and there's this bit where Spidey's falling and nearly hits some crane thing, but he moves just in time and goes straight through the middle!  (Believe me it's gold, FRIED GOLD!)

Shit, I have also missed Rufus.  I was concentrating on editing my sequence about the witches from Macbeth, which is finally completed, and forgot all about it!  I might listen to that now, if I can find it and if I can stay awake.  I'm very tired but unsure why.

Other top news; Linzi has her a man hehe.  She's found a big geeky nerd with law-defying hair who is genuinely nice.  Well done there
Through general conversations with Linzi, however, I have come to remember [and sometimes constantly think about] all the little things that happened between me and Nat over years 11 and 12; the things that I've spent a while forgetting or at least putting to the back of my mind.  The thing I miss most, and believe me it's not her, is being such good friends with someone and knowing that you both like each other but for one reason or another you are still just great friends.  Everything means so much more when you're at that stage; the way that you deny you're together when a friend innocently asks but then talk about 'how funny' it was for ages when you get back to their house, for example hehe.  Anyway, I don't like who she's become over the past year, she's not a horrible person, she's just too trendy and not the person who I considered a close friend a few years back.

Moving on, I will be participating in some heavy going sitting tomorrow afternoon with a certain fellow named Linzi.  We plan to eat some sexy toast and cheese things, or the masterpiece as it more commonly called: toast, cheese, sweetcorn and chicken haha I just salivated so much!  After some love making with melted cheese we will watch Ewan sing, hopefully, in Down With Love; a film that Whedon himself has said is underrated, and what he says goes!  Depending on whether my computer gets its downloading-arse in gear we may watch Eragon, if not I think we should watch Severence, just because the entire film looks so good, yes in a nerdy media student way.

Me and Hannah really need to get cracking on the Year 13: Actually Leaving DVD, otherwise there will be anarchy!  I wish everyone was in school all the time like in year 11, it made it so much easier!

I watched Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind yesterday round Linzi's.  My god that film is so beautiful, just perfection.  It got me thinking about memories and would I erase them if I could, would I even contemplate it?  I decided against the procedure hehe thank god!  I wish I had a pensieve [firstly I wish that they existed and then I will wish to have have one!] I am just a big memory minefield at the moment, I'm scared that I will forget tiny things that aren't even memories really, just fleeting occurences that I seem to remember because it's useful(!)

On Sunday I went to the Hockey Festival with Hannah to watch Wildcats play haha they didn't even play really, considering that Amanda scored their only goal; enough said!  Then me and Linzi met up with Haley, Nikki, Alice and A'me at the bar bit but kinda left 'cause we didn't have enough wristbands between us.  Alice chose to stay and try her luck with some Geordie bloke she got with a few nights before which really upset Nikki [bless her, the wine didn't help her emotions].  Anywho, we all went to 'Spoons and enjoyed Pear/Summer Fruits cider and hilarious conversations about nothing in particular.  I am in love with that group's sense of humour, I constantly wee myself due to much hilarity [not incontinence!]  When it closed we went back to the Hockey Festival and as most people were quite drunk now no one cared that we didn't have wristbands, all was groovy.  Both myself and Linzi downed a bacardi and coke each, mainly 'cause we couldn't be arsed to hold them; dancing was way more important!  I chatted to people like Gillard [who did win his 'Your Mum' fight, well done there] and Darren who I really don't see enough any more.  Many men there decided to take off their shirts/all of their clothes, because it's manly and not at all homo-erotic All men love touching other men, FACT!  The best bit of my night was properly talking to Linzi, who was finally under the influence Yay!  She actually opened up about stuff that had clearly been on her mind and I don't think she's done that with anyone for a while.  It wasn't even as if she was confessing dreadful things, it was just general stuff that she personally feels awkward talking about.  I don't think she realised how well I know her hehe.  We talked for ages when we got back to mine which was so unbelievably enjoyable, I'm not even sure why it just was.  I think it was because she was sharing thoughts with me no one else, no other friend from our group [to be fair I was the only person from our group who was there heh] I'm not sure if she'd feel ok about telling things like that to other friends, but that night all that mattered to me was what she was thinking and how she was feeling; I feel honoured to be divulged with such thoughts direct from the busy brain of O'Brien.  That night pretty much cemented our friendship for me.  We may only be together for one extra year, but I intend for it to be one funking sensational year with awesome travelling waiting at the end for us.  That girl is my something precious [or just my precious, who knows!] and one year or not I am not disappearing, no way!

"Bloc Party - I Still Remember" < What a tune!

I started watching Titanic again.  Ah Kate Winslet, the women who never ages!  I say that I started it, I mean I watched it from when Jack first sees Rose on the deck above.  I'm not entirely sure that I like the 'flying' bit reminding me of Nat.  When the four of us went to Girls and Boys and we ended up doing that thing that we tend to do when there's alcohol and the other person, we shared a Jack and Rose style backwards leaning kiss.  Good kiss hehe but it don't think I can watch that bit now without having flashes of me and Nat *rolls eyes* it's the same with 'Walk This Way', why did we kiss so much hah there's like an hour of songs that trigger the flashes!  Anyway, naked Winslet pushes anything and everything instantly out of my brain so no harm done really.

My parents are sort of ok with me going travelling after UCCA which is brilliant.  They even said that they wouldn't mind partly helping financially with it which is superly brilliant!  I'm guessing that it relies on getting ok grades in A Levels then doing well at UCCA; the UCCA thing won't be a problem but my A Levels could be a mixed bag considering the U in my critical research.  But I'll think about that when it comes around, best to get excited about travelling that isn't happening for over a year!  EEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE!  [< that's the excited noise]

On Friday Linzi bought Pan's Labyrinth and holy schmoly is that an awesome film!  Fantasy is just better than any genre, FACT!  It has it's own rules and, even though fantasy recycles itself, it always seems original.  Only in fantasy could you say that werewolf blood is strong enough to kill a vampire but only if consumed on the night of a full moon, and if challenged just reply with 'Dem's dah rules!' and no one can argue.  [That was totally made up mythology heh I don't want to make a mutiny among my guests [and yes that was a R+J quote a-thank-you] so I had to clarify ]  I like fantasy, and I make it my goal to put together a list of everything I like about the genre and make a film/series with it all included.  It's quite a hefty goal but there's no point meandering through life without an unreachable aspiration hehe it's nearly as distant as mine and Hannah's show!

I'm just putting off my media essay even longer now.  I'm clearly not going to do anything tonight, so I'll have to get someone to tell Miss Page I'm sick and then do it tomorrow night and check out how the others set it out.  I shouldn't be allowed to do well, I really do nothing at all...hmm perhaps why I don't do well!

Last week Hannah had a gathering for Comic Relief; it started as a gathering for the whole gang, but as the gang dropped like flies it was Hannah, Bec, Saz, Snorris and myself who gathered.  It was groovy.  The highlight of my evening was either accusing Snorris of saying bad things about the Africans or the Catherine Tate sketch with The Tennant, most probably the latter!  Note to self: you left the rum at Hannah's house.

We arranged to go out the next night so me and Linz met them in 'Spoons.  We had the best drink ever, FACT!  It was pear cider; it is so much more spectacular than it sounds!  We moseyed [sp] on to Chambers where the drinks were more expensive and the music that night was nicht good.  I was mixing drinks a-plenty heh silly me.  We went back to Alice's crib where there was more wine, god why more wine!?  I felt vommy and when I didn't vom Am'e gave us a lift back to mine, where I spewed [teehee SPEW] I left a vomit-line on the carpet then I made it to the toilet haha Linzi was already upstairs and sleeping!  The puking really cleared my head [not to mention my stomach] and so I was able to clear up the vomit-line perfectly and in morning you could never have told that there had once been the remanence of Subway vomit!

That night was Nat's 18th Birthday bash.  It was a strict dress code; suits and dresses.  Needless to say not myself, Hannah or Bec was up for wearing a dress so we shirt and tie and trilby-ed it hehe Hannah wore a black and white tie like her Vans and her trilby, Bec wore a red tie and a red trilby to match and I wore a wine red cravat type thing with my waistcoat and my grey trilby.  We looked smooth, and not unlike a group of some sort we suggested Charlie's Angles or D.E.B.S haha we looked dashing heh.  When we arrived we got many dirty looks from girls in dresses and many confused looks from older generations.  It was very much the game of 'Spot the Lesbian' 'cause across the room was Nat's ex Grace and her "friend" [their relationship was never disclosed] who were both in suits the night was groovy; me and Bec came up with the 'Aye up' game [basically put the phrase 'aye up, aye up' into every song possible!], watching Hannah get progressivly smashed ["You two are my fravourite peole."  Emphasis on the 'r' in favourite hehe], busting stupid moves, finally giving into the alcohol and so on.  After downing two vodka and cokes I was sufficiently hyper to take my embarrasing rave moves up a notch haha I ended up dancing with Nat more and more.  Her Mum's Mother-in-Law [hang on, that just means her Nan hehe] was disgusted or something with Hannah and Bec's dancing [she doesn't know about Nat's orientation obviously!] I'm guessing this was until my dancing with Nat turned in to kissing her!  I'm not going to blog about guilt because I'm over it and so it's gone hehe so yeah kissing was fun as always, not after more 'cause fun is all I want Can you hear Rufus singing?  I know you can!  It was Hannah's turn to throw up this night, both outside the club and at the side of the road!  I'm so glad it was freezing and raining, that made it super special for me and Bec Just had a very bizzare flashback of the night: me and Nat dancing suggestively [haha suggestively!  Understatement much!] and then joining dancing with Hannah and Bec :S that is some weird 4 person mix that is just bizzare, BIZ-ZARE!

It was moving day on Sunday; my parents had gone on holiday to Spain [where else?!] so Linzi lived with me for the week.  Best week ever it was a good way to test the living together waters, even though it's looking more and more shit on the Canterbury house front, and the water feels fine for sailing!  It was just so much fun.  We didn't even do anything in particular, haha I guess that's the sign of good company.  Linzi made a list of everything we did each day and it's the plainest list you could ever imagine but I had a smashing time!  It mainly consisted of beige food [or anything on that colour pallette], tea, marmite, America's Next Top Model and films [and Firefly, which I sucessfully got Linzi hooked on.  I knew she'd love it, yay for me!]  Friday was funny; I finished a couple of hours before Linz so I got home and started the washing and stuff like a proper housewife!  I was just like my Mum hehe it's scary, I was doing the ironing, I was annoyed at having to do ironing and I was watching the Tyra Banks Show while doing it haha I was just my Mum!  I had a cup of tea ready for ma man [Linzi] when she got in from a hard days single period of English!  It feels weird without her now, I was expecting to watch some more episodes of Firefly or something instead I'm doing nothing on my own hehe I badly want to move out next year, pfft next year?!  I want to move out now!  I might see how much more I earn a month if I work all day Saturday and Sunday and do an evening shift or something, maybe even a Tuesday afternoon.  Anything to boost my chances of MOVING OUT! 

It's starting to scare me how many of mine and Linzi's conversations end with "people are rubbish!"  even if they are rubbish I'm worried that people are irritating me too easily.  Linzi is quite possibly the most unrubbish person I know, I'm glad I get to spend another year of my life with her, I'm practically giddy about the idea haha Don't get me wrong, I won't know what to do without Hannah, but I'm lucky enough to have a group of best friends including two super best friends, at least one's sticking around for another year  could I sound more like a child *rolls eyes* I'm rambling now.

I am a menace and should be stopped.
Overly dramatic I know hehe but I need to learn how to control myself!  That or stop getting myself into potentially compromising situations.  Sophie came to mine Friday afternoon and we watched But I'm a Cheerleader; one of my favourite "special interest" films ever!  After that we met Becky, Andy and Bert [teehee a guy our age is actually called Bert!] and we walked to Dukes.  It was a good evening, starting with me kicking Sopie's arse at pool!  I rule *spoken like The Spacey*  I did have a lil too much to drink.  Haley, Nikki and Alice popped in briefly it was so great to see them.  They thought I was having a mid-life crisis 'cause everyone I was with was in the year below haha Hannah and Bec swung by for a drinky too as Hot Fuzz was entirely full, even the Deluxe screens!  Eventually I was left with the minors by myself hehe I'm not sure why I carried on drinking, Batman only knows!  I escorted Sophie to the toilet ['cause she's afraid that she'll get locked in heh] for the second time that evening, so I believed it to be a purely platonic venture!  Until she came out of the toilets and we erm had a hug, a long hug.  When we pulled out of the hug we did the kiss-lean in thing but I stopped!  I had to stop it otherwise everything that we settled would just be a complicated mess in the morning [and this is what I told her, yup that I did!]  It went back and forth for what seemed like ages - "It will complicate everything" "No it won't"... - until that part of me took over; that eediot part of me that hears the word SELF CONTROL and says 'Self-what?  What on earth is that?  Where's the woman?'  So it goes without saying that we ended up kissing.  It was so much more intense than at Clare's party.  Which is weird considering how utterly out of the blue it was then.  Her kiss was..sobering.  I stopped feeling tipsy in an instant.  This is really screwing me up; I keep on thinking that I don't want things to change, but then I can't seem to understand how much I really want her.  I was just buried in her kiss and everything was so intense, heh especially after I'd pushed her towards the wall *rolls eyes* I was mere seconds away from kissing her neck, that would've been the complete loss of control scenario!  But I stopped!  Then talking and confused rambling to each other followed.  I tried to explain how I felt about how she should be able to have all of me and "not me half pissed outside the toilets, again" [<nice direct quote there heh] I think she took it the wrong way.  I meant that she deserves me to be wanting her full stop, with no doubts or complications, but I think she thought that I meant something to do with being pissed and being intimate.  Anyway, we were interrupted by Becky 'cause we had to wait outside for the taxi [Sophie was to stay at mine that night too!  Awkward?!] the taxi driver was weird and scary so that broke any tension between us, 'cause it was friggin' funny!  I thought both my parents were home and asleep so I didn't bother with the usual "Hi, I'm home and not drunk!" routine.  I looked for the sleeping bag but couldnt find it.  Sophie didn't see a problem with sleeping in the same single bed...course not!  But pfft I didn't care, I was sleepy drunk now and needed to sleep!  I changed into some PJ type clothes and climbed into my bed next to her.  It wasn't awkward or odd, it was nice.  Nice until I heard my Mum get home!  I got out of bed and long story short I slept in the spare room.  Mum was only weird that night, she hasn't probed me with stupid 'phobic questions today or anything so all is good.  But before I grabbed a pillow from my bed to take into the spare room with me, I had a hushed conversation with Sophie.  I was telling her my mum was weird hehe she said her mum would be the same.  I went to get up from the bed whe nshe held my arm meaningfully.  There was a half-lean hehe which stopped.  We hugged and then she still was looking meaningfully at me, so I kissed her on the cheek and whispered stuff about complications again.  I got up and said "fuck" hushed but audibly hehe.  There was some inter-room texting but yeah, stuff's the same now.
CONFUSED.com am I!

"The Bluetones - Down at the Reservoir"

After the interview me and Hannah walked into town [with my portfolio and Lucifer in a box!] and we went into Virgin.  God I love that place!  I bought Imagine Me & You and I loved it!  It was a nice british comedy but appealing to the community rather than the masses I'm not going to lie and say that it's just the same as any other rom-com and everyone would love it, 'cause obviously it wouldn't.  If it was intended for all audiences then it would have been showing at Ashford, but it's not and so it wasn't.  That really pissed me off though, the fact that I'd waited for this film for a long while and then it doesn't even show at the biggest cinema near me, not even Canterbury showed it grrr damn those hetro managers heh!  Anyway, the film has Piper Perabo with an english accent, yum!  But the main reason for everyone to see this film is Tony Head; his drunken Dad dancing at the wedding is enough for anyone to watch it!  Actually, the best bit about this film is the way it ends, it's basically Kissing Jessica Stein with a better ending, one that doesn't show being gay as something you can dip into every now and then!  [I've had to put it on again now!]

"The Bluetones - Keep the Home Fires Burning"

So then we arrive at Valentine's Day; it's just a load of commercial bullshit isn't it?!  It's designed more to make people, mainly women, feel bad for being single.  Bull. Shit!  I don't really care that much to be honest, it's just when you hear people talk about having to have a Valentine it's exhausting to listen to!  I had a nice day and that's all that matters Me and Sophie went to see Hot Fuzz [brilliant - go and see it!] and after we went to KFC and scraped together enough money for some food.  We got there about 3:30pm and the next time we looked at the time it was practically 5:30pm hah I don't think you're meant to stay in there for that long, ever!  It was so nice just to talk and not care about the time.  I genuinely really like her, but there's still that part of me that doesn't want things to change, and she deserves 100% commitment from me.  She got me a present, it wasn't for Valentine's day but this was the next time she saw me and thus it acted as a Valentine's gift, confusing ja?!  It was the sweetest thing; it was an X-Men comic/graphic novel type thing and it's beautiful.  It's times like that I wish that I was more certain in how I feel; I so badly wanted to kiss her, it was such a cute thing to get me and thoughtful too, but this it what I need to control if I don't want to confuse the situation.  Anyway, we might spend the day together on Friday and watch all the lesbian films that somehow she hasn't seen!  I don't understand how she hasn't seen them, I thought it was like a duty to have seen them like the duty to be good at pool or fancy Shane from The L Word haha.

"The Bluetones - If..."

"The Bluetones - Down at the Reservoir"

After the interview me and Hannah walked into town [with my portfolio and Lucifer in a box!] and we went into Virgin.  God I love that place!  I bought Imagine Me & You and I loved it!  It was a nice british comedy but appealing to the community rather than the masses I'm not going to lie and say that it's just the same as any other rom-com and everyone would love it, 'cause obviously it wouldn't.  If it was intended for all audiences then it would have been showing at Ashford, but it's not and so it wasn't.  That really pissed me off though, the fact that I'd waited for this film for a long while and then it doesn't even show at the biggest cinema near me, not even Canterbury showed it grrr damn those hetro managers heh!  Anyway, the film has Piper Perabo with an english accent, yum!  But the main reason for everyone to see this film is Tony Head; his drunken Dad dancing at the wedding is enough for anyone to watch it!  Actually, the best bit about this film is the way it ends, it's basically Kissing Jessica Stein with a better ending, one that doesn't show being gay as something you can dip into every now and then!  [I've had to put it on again now!]

"The Bluetones - Keep the Home Fires Burning"

So then we arrive at Valentine's Day; it's just a load of commercial bullshit isn't it?!  It's designed more to make people, mainly women, feel bad for being single.  Bull. Shit!  I don't really care that much to be honest, it's just when you hear people talk about having to have a Valentine it's exhausting to listen to!  I had a nice day and that's all that matters Me and Sophie went to see Hot Fuzz [brilliant - go and see it!] and after we went to KFC and scraped together enough money for some food.  We got there about 3:30pm and the next time we looked at the time it was practically 5:30pm hah I don't think you're meant to stay in there for that long, ever!  It was so nice just to talk and not care about the time.  I genuinely really like her, but there's still that part of me that doesn't want things to change, and she deserves 100% commitment from me.  She got me a present, it wasn't for Valentine's day but this was the next time she saw me and thus it acted as a Valentine's gift, confusing ja?!  It was the sweetest thing; it was an X-Men comic/graphic novel type thing and it's beautiful.  It's times like that I wish that I was more certain in how I feel; I so badly wanted to kiss her, it was such a cute thing to get me and thoughtful too, but this it what I need to control if I don't want to confuse the situation.  Anyway, we might spend the day together on Friday and watch all the lesbian films that somehow she hasn't seen!  I don't understand how she hasn't seen them, I thought it was like a duty to have seen them like the duty to be good at pool or fancy Shane from The L Word haha.

"The Bluetones - If..."